little girl! dont be so sad okay! :) 

mom and dad, i love you!
fags!

little zhen! 

cherries!!


my bestest friends, boyfriend, and SISSY!! 

 

grace! so sexy today!


 

 

haha more balloons!
 

 

my handsome boy! 

hahaha so blur but aiyo so cute! 

 

 

 

that's my boy! 

yakun at robinson road, waiting for our visa! 

 

 

ajj at munchy house, yih! 

was a pretty fabulous day today.
nice time lunching with 3 jays
janicia, jean and joel!

:)

love these 3 people!
pictures up soon.

MY VISA WAS APPROVED
praise God, almighty father
He is good all the time!

new day, new discovery

its the 15th today or rather the 16th because its past midnight already.
less than ten days left and i have too much to do
too much to leave behind.
i think its the first time i've felt sad to leave this place
the comfort of home, the love of dad mom and family
joel and fags..

and im not ready the leave at a time i feel so unstable and insecure.
but as eve says in her blog, life's like that, isnt it?

grin. i want to cheer up but i cant.
i want to take your word, but i dont know if i can
i know im being a ***** but i cant help it
i know i should forget it and move on but i cant bring myself to

God, would you give me a contrite heart that's willing to change and seek you in all that i do?
God, would you make me a person who's ever so willing to forgive just like how you so readily forgave us?
God, would you allow me to stop being an idiot and dwelling in misery that i've created for myself?

on the bright side, joel makes the best spaghettis in the whole wide world.
and yay i got my international student card! yipeeee hee hee
and because i got materials, i can start on project byebyeade for joel and happy birthday evie for sissy !

i know what everyone thinks
im always the bad guy who's overreacting and unreasonable.

but i guess they're right to an extent.

and i guess no one knows how i feel.
how confused i am. how i suddenly realised i've lost my status. how foolish i am to think i can get anything i want in the world, without giving enough.

but i 'll say im still pretty much in love now, and its not time for me to let go yet.

i want to focus all on God, for Him to allow the best to happen and for a happy ending eventually, but i do know that i hardly deserve it.

haha ok so im back and im blogging from my little pretty notebook. its quite pretty and i love it
and those boys with smelly hands must keep away from this pretty thing
haha the brothers of course

so today was kinda neat,
i asked joel if he could have a girl, who would it be
a) blahwhoshouldnotbementioned
b) blahwhoshouldnotbementioned 2
c) a fellow classmate from medschool

hahaha and though he picked A, i convinced him to pick c

and made him tell me a story of how he fell in love with the girl
and when he really told me a story
i was devastated cos u know he was supposed to insist it wouldnt happen and therefore not tell me the story! hahaha

so anyway here's how the silly story goes

"we met in med school of course. study in the library together till late at night. we buy each other dinner and stuff. and oh she's this really sexy girl, voluptuous and all, yet with a teeny teeny waist. and well see, she stays in the hostel, so i dont have to waste time or money to send her home. some nights i stay over. i get the bed and she sleeps on the floor. "

omg JOEL u can kiss me goodbye hahahahahaha

haha oh when i got home, everyone had dinner already cos joel refused to let me go home earlier
but yea mommy and daddy came to join me while i was eating and while we talked, we had a good laugh and i think i ll really miss times like this :)